Invitations are soul destroying


Well, I might be going a little overboard with that statement but the whole process of deciding who to invite and who to remove from the list is the biggest headache I have had so far with this wedding.

If you don’t know me personally, I am a people-pleaser and I want to keep EVERYONE happy. But I can’t.  I would love to invite everyone. But I am not able too.

After a big discussion with my Matron of Honour and my Fiancé, who have opposing opinions, I think I have decided to keep both of them happy and do both (do you see the common theme here?)

So my question to you… Am I doing the right thing?

So I am now thinking I will invite people to come and check out the wedding (which is being held in a pretty cool location and has its own bar on premises) to keep those who can’t wait to toast my nuptials happy and then I am organising an after-party! This is for those friends who we just can’t invite to the reception but who, we know just want to come and enjoy a few drinks and celebrate what will be a very lovely day with us.

So… is it wrong to do this?

I know it is my wedding and in theory I can do whatever I want but in reality, I care what people think of me and never want to hurt them or disappoint them so I definitely do not want to send out an invitation to an after-party if it will offend that person.

After party fun

Disclaimer, this is not a photo of me or any of my friends however, I did “borrow” it from a dear friend called GOOGLE

5 thoughts on “Invitations are soul destroying

  1. Tasch, as one of your mates, and understanding how much a wedding can cost and stress a couple out, I would be more than happy to only watch your nuptials. I consider that the ceremony is the important part of the union between a man and a woman – not the after party. But your socialite base of friends may also want to tear it up and continue the celebration at the after party. So I think immediate family and your party going, good, close friends, who make the effort to keep in contact with you, should be invited to both. Everyone else – pick based on their personality type and the basis of whether; they are a romantic and may want to be included in the ceremony; or if they are the party going type and only want to be at the reception. You must also remember that the way people react to not being invited is actually their issue, not yours. You could please everyone but you may have to sell a kidney to do so.
    Davina xx
    PS If you don’t invite me to either. I won’t mind as long as there are heaps of pictures on face book for me to look at. It’s your day – Do it your way – With your style!!!

    1. Excuse me Ms Davina, as I have already stated to you on a previous occasion. YOU WILL BE ATTENDING the whole kit and kaboodle!
      I appreciate you being a great friend and that is why you are on the list.
      LOVE you and you will be there taking the pics that will be seen on Facebook 😉

      BTW that is what I think… my fun loving party friends can come along to the ‘After Party’ and hopefully they don’t get offended by only getting that invite.

  2. Hi Natascha, I’m confused…. are you planning a ceremony with drinks immediately after, open to everyone and then a private “after party” by which I guess you mean “reception” that is invitation only? If so, this is quite acceptable, as many particularly friends of your parents, acquaintances etc may like to see you married and understand the reception is family and close friends only. some people do drinks, afternoon tea or just a quick ‘hi’ to those who just attend the ceremony. Is this your plan or….

    1. Hi April,

      I have an early wedding then the cocktail reception with canapes and a drinks package which will finish around 8:30pm and at that stage The Grace Establishment is open to the general public so I thought I would invite people to an “after party” So our party friends can come and say hello.

      For those who don’t like late night partying then they would be invited to the ceremony! The more the merrier I say.

  3. I totally get where you’re coming from with doing this – it must be SO hard to narrow a list down – one of the reasons why Jeremy and I got married at the last minute and had 12 people at our wedding 😉 But you have to do what’s right for YOU – it’s YOUR day and no-one elses 🙂 I wouldn’t be offended if I wasn’t invited to anything because I know how many friends you have!! 🙂

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